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The Truth Hurts (Legend of Zelda)

 
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Dave
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 9:16 pm    Post subject: The Truth Hurts (Legend of Zelda) Reply with quote

I knew it! That bitch!

Yes, it's safe for work.

http://kotaku.com/gaming/truth-hurts/robot-chicken-questions-links-chivalry-298176.php?autoplay=true
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Parsifal
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 10:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is a topic that has been talked over many times by many people. The general consensus tends to come down to Link gets nothing. Ever. Period. Look at any game in the Zelda series, and even the comic that ran way back in Nintendo Power. What always happens at the end? Many thanks, a promise of peace, and Link either gets shafted with another question or they go their separate ways. It happened in "Ocarina of Time", it happened at the end of the comic (they lost their "connection" and once the Master Sword got put back in its rock they just drifted apart) and it'll happen again.

In the more "fevered" ruminations there's some "closet lovin'" between Impa (either the original or the "OoT" one, depending how "wrong" your mentality) to try and help explain the total frigidity, but anyway you cut it all he gets is thanks, /at most/. Sure its a parable of sorts and the whole thing is supposed to retain a certain measure of innocence, but he doesn't even get a thank you kiss on the cheek or a warm hug.

Quick Rundown:
Link/Zelda= Nothing. At all. Ever.

Mario/Peach= She's kind of "drama" but at least she bakes him cakes, kisses and holds his hand, hugs him, throws him parties and goes out to play sports with him. Generally, she acknowledges he exists and shows overt signs she likes him.

Luigi/Daisy=Generally affectionate in public, very friendly. Probably rides him like uptight boss on a lazy office worker at home.

R.O.B. 64/"Sloppy" Slippy Toad: Ask not questions ye not want answered...

Anyone care to guess what Link's going to get after this?
I've /heard/ that the "Twilight Princess" non-mega blonde version of Zelda is less of a ice queen, but if that's not the case he's likely to get more affection from those R.O.B.s that triggered the sub-space bomb.,,you know, like Slippy.
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Dave
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 10:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The answer to the question is: Nothing. He will get nothing. As always. He's better off rescuing Peach. In fact, if you go the Smash Bros Dojo (the official smash brothers brawl site), you have to choose which princess you save. Link. Listen Very Carefully. Rescue Peach. at worst, she'll at least give you a peck on the cheek. At best... well... Mario wasn't around... and a girl gets lonely.

In Twilight Princess... that's tough. Zelda wasn't an Ice Queen. In fact, it's actually pretty open to interpretation (Maybe it was Links time FINALLY). However, the Twilight Princess did obviously warm up to Link, although the ending is a bid sad. Play it, beat it, be glad you spent the time.
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Parsifal
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 10:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

After I posted I checked the Dojo and saw you had to choose which one to save. If it was the blonde Zelda there'd be no contest: Peach. Its like in "Marvel: Ultimate Alliance" where you have to choose which one to save, Nightcrawler or Jean Grey. Hmmm...Really nice guy who's seems cool to hang around and is also my favorite X-Man to boot, or the jacked up broad who's come back from death more times than a normal person has fingers on their hands. And her with her latest death being another blow to Cyclops's confidence being good for at the very least a few laughs to boot? There's really no choice at all in either case.

"Choose! But know that you can only save one of them...Its either Jean Grey or-"
"The Other one"
"Wait, what? Really? I haven't even told you who-"
"Don't need to. The other one."
"Oh, okay then....you're no fun."
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Dave
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 11:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Between Peach and Zelda...

Hmm... cute, if somewhat overdramatic blonde who's highly affectionate, kind, caring and sweet? Or attractive, yet rather cold blonde who has an air of superiority and never puts out? No contest. Peach.

Now, if Daisy was thrown into the equation...
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